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Nine Biggest Turn-Offs
Dymond • Nov 05, 2019
Do You Have Non-Negotiables?
Earlier this week someone told me that I'll always be single because my standards are too high. The reality is I don't have high "standards" when it comes to men, but there's certain things I WILL NOT tolerate. I've already been "dumb" and ignored the signs from a guy, so why would I ever do that again. While you’re single you’re supposed to discover your wants and non negotiables. I know exactly what I want and truth is I'm really not looking for it. True love will find you when you least expect it. After being in a long relationship, I needed to take time to focus on me and discover who I was. I’m at a point now, where I’m open to dating. Once someone shows me that they’re not it, I'm walking away. I refuse to "force" ANYTHING! I'm honestly really different from other woman my age. I‘m not looking to just date just to date, I’m interested in building longevity with someone. I thought why not use this chance to share nine of my biggest turn offs with you.
One:
I can not stand a man who wants to text/talk to me all day, that's the quickest way to get blocked. I'm always on the go and doing something, I can't possibly text you every hour of the day. I'm very busy and if I'm dating someone with too much time on their hands, they'll feel some kind of way. Also how could you be doing anything productive if you're talking to me all day?
Two:
I take my faith very seriously. No, you don't have to be in church every Sunday, but can you at least pray? When my life gets rocky, my initial instinct is prayer. If him and I are having problems, I need to be able to fall to our knees together and pray our way out. Do you believe in God, if not I can't talk to you, PERIOD!
Three:
Let's be honest, nobody wants a broke significant other. I have a job and run my business, so I refuse to date someone who doesn't have something going for themselves. I have a crazy work ethic, so I need someone who values work like me. Plus, I need to know, if we lose everything today, that you'll be able to grind to get it back.
Four:
I love a manly man. I'm a very strong and opinionated woman, I can't be with a soft spoken man. Plus, I'm from New York, masculinity to me includes strength, courage, independence, leadership, and assertiveness.
Five:
I'm currently in the season of saving and building. Which has turned me into a homebody. Yes, I still go out occasionally, but it's less than twice a month. A big turn off is a man who doesn't know how to sit still. Going out and being seen every weekend, might be fun, but is a waste of money. I can't be with someone who is obsessed with always being out.
Six:
I take support in any relationship very seriously. When I'm dating, I support my man's dreams and goals like they're my own. I can't be with someone who doesn't support me and motivate me to be better. Especially because, my business is my baby.
Seven:
I can't be with someone who doesn't dream, and ACTIVELY work towards those dreams. I'm super ambitious and persistent when it comes to creating the life of my dreams. When dating someone who doesn't dream and grind to make them a reality, we can't talk about our visions or life purpose. Having big dreams motivates and inspires you. It also helps you to achieve any goal that you want to achieve. I love a man with great drive.
Eight:
I'm very goofy, especially when it comes to relationships. I can't be with someone who can't take a joke. I laugh all day and I don't want anyone who is too serious. I love a guy with a great sense of humor. Yes there is a time to be serious, but can I be myself around you without feeling uncomfortable.
Nine:
I'm building this public influencer life. With that being said, I'm always going to events. The man for me is a man who can function in a public setting. I hate a man who is childish or who gets awkward, when talking to new people. I need someone who compliments me and who can hold different conversations with people from all walks of life. Can I take you to the dinner meeting, and you talk to the executives.
With all that being said, I have a clear understanding of the type of man I do NOT want. I just want someone who is interesting. A lot of people aren't interesting. It helps a lot to know your non-negotiables before dating. I'm not here to change someone, so once someone shows me they're compromising my non-negotiables, I let go. I made sure not to put physical attributes on my list, because looks fade. I refuse to settle with a man just because. Take the time to learn you, and learn your wants and needs in relationships. Fellas, get clear on the type of lady you want too. Learn your worth! Take the time to get to know someone before falling for them. Once you fall for them, your judgement becomes a little foggy. Dating is not a game, pair up with a purpose.
