Push Past Being Uncomfortable

Confidence Is Deeper Than Your Appearance 

A few weeks ago, my trainer, Jiyan, asked me if I could join her photo shoot for her rebrand. Initially, I was excited, but the more I thought about it, my emotions began to take over. I sat and stared at myself in the mirror, and thought about all the ways I had dropped the ball which included: All the workouts I had missed, all the snacks that I had eaten, and all the times I decided to get fast food rather than cooking. My mind began to spiral, and I didn’t think I would be able to do it. Typically, I work out in oversized sweatshirts, to hide my imperfections. I can’t tell you the last time I went outside in a sports bra and yoga pants. I’m human, so I struggle with my body image just as much as the next person. It’s some days I wake up and don’t feel pretty. 

As I began to think about what Jiyan had asked me to do, I started looking up fitness shoots and immediately compared myself. I’ve been in the gym for years, but didn’t get consistent until November of last year. Looking at the “ideal fitness girlies,” I looked at myself and said we don’t even compare. I felt bad and unworthy. Before I could spiral too far, something kicked in and I thought to myself why are you going to sit here and believe all these lies? I started to combat every negative thought and replaced it with a positive one. This lasted for about an hour and before I knew it, my confidence boosted. The next day, I showed up and was apart of the photo shoot. I’m not at my ideal weight, but I felt good. It ended up being really fun and I met some amazing women. Plus the photos came out great! 

I say all this to say, confidence is deeper than your appearance. Confidence is bigger than beauty. Self love is an everyday struggle, so on days when your mind is trying to take over, you have to combat that with positivity. Confidence comes from showing up and doing the things you said you would do. Don’t beat yourself up for days when you don’t feel your best, but don’t allow yourself to stay there either. Also, don’t run from things that make you uncomfortable, I’m not referring to illegal or unsafe things! Fear told me, not to do it. Had I listened to fear, I wouldn’t have moved. If I listened to fear, I wouldn’t have did the shoot and would’ve missed out on meeting some amazing girls, who motivated me. It’s 2024, don’t allow fear to run your life. In the past, fear held me back from evolving into the woman I want to be, but not anymore. I’m not telling you to be fearless, but I’m telling you to do it scared. You never know what’s on the other side of the fear you’re feeling! Getting butterflies in your stomach is proof that you’re pushing yourself. 2024 is a year of getting comfortable with being uncomfortable. Being nervous is not a bad thing. Don’t let your mind get in the way of you trying new things. The bigger the risk the bigger the reward. One thing I plan to do this year, is take more risks. I have a bad habit of coming up with the worse case scenario in my head, and allowing it to stop me from doing things, but thru therapy I’m learning that that’s all in my head. If you’re like me, it’s time to push anyway! That’s my focus for the year, not allowing my emotions to stop me from pushing towards my goals. It’s only week two of the new year, it’s time to go for broke!