How Keeping Your Word to Yourself Builds Confidence (The Ultimate Self Care)
Why Self Trust Is The Foundation Of Real Confidence
One thing I’ve been focused on in this season is building my confidence. I assumed if I did all the things, it would come: clearer skin (hence the dermatologist), staying consistent in the gym, getting my dream body (yes, I had Lipo and maintain it by working out with my trainer). I thought my confidence would be through the roof.
I quickly learned that isn’t the case.
Confidence truly does come from within. I’ve always heard that, but I never really knew what it meant. I thought I could love myself and solo date my way into confidence, , but you can’t.
Please hear me: solo dates are essential. Bubble baths and self gifts are cute. Traveling is great. But the ultimate self care is doing what you said you were going to do.
I know, , it doesn’t sound glamorous or pretty. But the truth is, discipline is sexy. I know those two words don’t usually go together, but that’s the only way you build real confidence. If you don’t honor your word to yourself, you can’t fully trust yourself. And if you don’t trust yourself, how can you trust others?
I’ve been honoring my word to myself, and it’s been a game changer.
It may seem small, but it’s actually harder than you think. Keeping your word to yourself means doing what you said you were going to do, even if you only said it to yourself. So many times I would say, “Tomorrow I’m doing this or that,” and when the day came, I did nothing.
Not only was procrastination killing my productivity, it was killing my confidence.
It may seem small. You said you were going to the gym this week. You said you’d fold your clothes when you got home Friday, but you didn’t. No biggie, right? Wrong.
The more you do that, the more you tell your brain, I’m not a person who does what they say they’re going to do. Subconsciously. It may seem insignificant, but when it’s time for you to show up for yourself in bigger areas, your brain won’t believe you’ll follow through, and it won’t get done.
It creates a cycle that keeps you stuck.
Now, I get it, we’re human. Sometimes things come up. I’m not talking about those moments. The truth is, you will drop the ball sometimes, and that’s okay. The problem is when it becomes a pattern.
When you don’t honor your word more than you do, you set yourself up for failure.
And honoring your word isn’t just about doing what you said you were going to do, it’s also about not doing what you said you weren’t going to do.
You told yourself you were done with that habit, but you went back. You said you didn’t want to go out, but your friends called, and now you’re out.
You said you were done accepting the bare minimum, but you spun the block on someone who already showed you who they were.
Honoring your word goes both ways. Stop bending on what you said.
Another way you keep your word to yourself is by honoring your wants and your needs. You said you needed peace, but you keep allowing chaotic people, places, and situations into your life. You said you were going to try new things, but at the first sign of discomfort, you quit. Your body needs rest, but you ignore it to hang out or grind.
That’s another way you’re neglecting self care and killing your confidence.
You have to honor your body. We only get one. It’s your temple. Be mindful of what you feed yourself and where you go. I’m not saying every environment is bad, but you know how your body feels in certain spaces. Pay attention to that.
I once saw a video of a girl who said every time a particular friend would call, she felt her body tighten up. Could it be that the Holy Spirit is nudging you to walk away? This is where discernment comes in.
I challenge you to start paying attention to your body and how you feel. Don’t be so disconnected that you miss what your body is trying to tell you. It could be protecting you from heartbreak, betrayal, or more.
It’s time to do what you said you were going to do.
You’re only hurting yourself when you don’t keep your word. You could be the very thing standing in the way of your next level of confidence. Because confidence isn’t built in big moments. It’s built in the small promises you keep to yourself, every single day.
Every time you follow through, you tell yourself, I can trust me. And that changes everything.
All the other forms of self care are secondary, because this is how you truly show up for yourself.
So start small. Do one thing you said you were going to do, today.
And then do it again tomorrow.
That’s how you become her.
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