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Nine Biggest Turn Ons
Dymond Phillips • Jan 13, 2020
What does the girl behind the blog really like?
During my hiatus, I was reviewing all of my 2019 content and analytics. One post that did surprisingly well was my, "Nine Biggest Turn Offs" (click here - to read.) As a lot of you know, I am very picky when it comes to dating. After reading about all that I don't like, I think it's time for me to tell you what I actually do like. Planning out this post was so hard, because it's really hard to "impress" me. My turn ons have evolved as I've gotten older. What I used to want and accepted before, I refuse to accept now. Like I said before, I‘m not looking to just date just to date, I’m interested in building longevity with someone. So let's jump into my nine biggest turn ons. They aren't in any particular order.
- One: I love a family oriented person. I love seeing how a man interacts with his loved ones. You can tell a lot about a person just by how they deal with their family. I understand everybody isn't fortunate to have a lot of family around them. I also understand people have deep family problems that result in estranged relatives. But this one is for men who have their family in their lives but don't prioritize them. I am very close with my family, so whoever I date will have to take interest in my family. A turn on for me is seeing a man embrace my family, without me having to ask. If a man is disrespectful and doesn't care about his own family, how can I expect him to care about mine. Family is everything to me! I love a family oriented man. NOT A MAMAS BOY, there is a BIG DIFFERENCE!
- Two: If you didn't know, I'm very goofy and I love to laugh. I love a man with a great sense of humor. Somebody who can make me laugh will always be a turn on for me. (Think about it: If you were trapped in a car with only your significant other, would you be bored or entertained?) When dating, I love being able to have inside jokes with my boo. Being able to sing songs and be silly is such a turn on.
- Three: Like I said before, I take support VERY SERIOUSLY. It is a big turn on when the guy I'm dating takes interests in whatever I have going on. Read/promote my blog, suggest topics and video ideas to me, boost me up when I'm shooting content, when I get off track tell me get back focused, I LOVE ALL THAT! I really enjoy natural support that I don't have to ask for because it's genuine. My significant other needs to be my cheerleader because I will definitely be that for him. I'm going to push him to follow any goals he wants to reach.
- Four: I love a God Fearing man. A man that is so focused on God will forever be a turn on. Only a man who loves and fears God will be able to love me the way I should be loved. Anything else is flesh inspired and that can easily change based on circumstances. I love a man who can feed me spiritually. It's something about a man who prays for you; that's a different feeling.
- Five: I'm from New York, I'm a natural born hustler. I love a man who knows how to grind and stack. "Match my hustle, better yet beat my hustle and inspire me to elevate mine." I'm all for people following their dreams and working everyday to make them a reality. A man who has a dream and is actively chasing that dream is a big turn on to me. Anything you really want you can have as long as you're willing to grind and do the work for it. I need to know if we lose everything today, will you be able to go get it back. A man who is goal oriented and passionate about his future turns me on. A man who has 5 year goals, and 10 years goals is everything. I love a man who knows what kind of man he want to be, and who's working everyday to become that. Those are things I love to see in a man
- Six: Dress it up and make it real for me. A man who can dress is such a true on. I'm not saying you have to be dressed every time you see me, but can we do a date night where we both get dressed up and go out. I love seeing a man piece different outfits together, not basic trends. Don't get me wrong, I love me a nike jogging suit too, that's why I like to see my man switch it up. I need to know, if I take you to a event, that you can come correct. I love a dude who can match my fly.
- Seven: I don't know why, but I have the attention span of a child. It's easy for people to grasp my attention for a second but can you maintain it. Simply put, are you interesting? So many people aren't authentically themselves and are always trying to be somebody else. A man who is interesting and who can keep me engaged is a huge turn on. For example; can you communicate, hold a conversation, can you intrigue me mentally? It's not really about impressing me, it's more important to interest me. It's really a turn on when a guy can get the wheels in my head turning. Keep me on my toes, be spontaneous!
- Eight: R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Respect is everything. A man who shows me respect will turn me on. Respect is what sets the bases of a relationship. I love a man who respects and love himself first. People talk so much about woman knowing their worth, but men need to know their worth too. Someone who respects me, will treat me right. Respect my opinion, my voice, my feelings, my boundaries, my business, and my space. Dating a man who respects me will help me open up and be comfortable with him. According to Inspiring Tips, "Respect breeds the kind of love thats way beyond romance. It creates love that understands and accepts, love that is willing to hold on and willing to let go, love that lasts and overcomes all the qualms and conflicts that you and your partner have had. You two may be stripped off the romance and adventure, and while all that’s left is a boring future, if you have bred respect for each other that results to the willingness to continue with life together, then that’s true love." That's a turn on because that's exactly the kind of love I want.
- Nine: I love a man who expresses his feelings. A man who compliments me and builds up my ego. I love myself whole heartedly, but it's something about when the guy I'm dating boosts me up. It's a feeling that's hard to describe. Let me know when you think I look good because it shows that you pay attention to me. If I change my hair tell me how you like or don't like it. I love seeing a guy who pays attention to the details with me, because it shows that you are interested to get to know me. Hype me up like the guys who try to holla at me at the gas station do.
These are just nine things that are my non-negotiables with a man. I have many more turn ons but these are just my top ones. These things continue to change as I age. My wants at eighteen were different to now and they'll have evolved when I turn 30. I'm not perfect at all these things. It's important that I have somebody who makes me level up. I'm looking for somebody who will grow and evolve with me. Not just fit the 22 year old me, the guy for me needs to fit the 30/40 year old me. TD Jakes said, "I need somebody that as I come to the fullness of my intellectual capacity that you have the fluidity of thought and nimbleness of mind to flow with me."
That is so true!!!!! This is why, whoever is in my life I pray about because God see's the future and I can't. I don't want to be with somebody who's good for where I'm at right now. Can you fit where I'm heading. Dating isn't a game, be careful and precise with who you chose to share energy with.
